More confused rambling from me

Well, I am back writing here, although best to leave things to picture images, perhaps. I am no longer quite so anonymous now…that’s me (instantly recognisable, of course)! Hi Mum! (I know you are no longer paying attention because you think your daughter is a bit weird, although you knew that all along). Am I writing this blog more for me than anything else? Trying to get back into the swing of writing here, but always asking myself why I am writing and if anything I write makes any sense at all. But…I have a phone line again and it took me sooooo many visits to the Telikom office I might as well make good use of it now. But I am (as so often) not sure where to start as it has just been crazy times – again, still. I would like to say this one is for you, but it isn’t really. Yet, anyway. I don’t know you very well at all yet. But you intrigue me. And that is good for now. But, yes, I am wondering how “unhinged” you really might be. It would of course be just like me to be intrigued by unhingedness. Throw in some tao contemplations while you are balancing on a surfboard and you have the recipe for…some kind of adventure, I think. Bear in mind, I am very wary. I dive in head first and then swim away again, sneak back, dive deep, circle around. Act confused. Just me. And today and the past week I have very much been thinking about good friends who have just been hit hard sideways by…I think it was by the profit-hungry forces of the planet. And just some very bad luck as well. D, on the phone to you, I so so wanted to fix it all, just make it all better for you. And I am so worried about you. No matter how much I say and how sweetly I say it, it is so so hard for you and I can’t help much. And I don’t know why it is all so unfair. And so shall I quit now after all this battling because I can’t work for people like that and I need to stick together with like-minded good energy, or what shall I do? And of course now I am even more alone, but for now I will be thinking much more about your sadness and wondering what small things I can do to help you in some way through all this. The retreat is a deal, it truly is. But first you have to get well and bouncy again. It’s a beautiful, bright, sunny evening and I need to go across the channel to say goodbye to yet another person. And go along with the Tau-Mau combination, which should be fun, I think. I might even beat them at pong. Oh, and Berkeley Man, yes there has been a lot of craziness going on here, and I didn’t write for a while. You will hear about soon, and you will be a little shocked. And just why do I make things so cryptic here?